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Product Description
A proven plan for overcoming the painful end of any romantic relationship, including divorce, with practical strategies for healing, getting your confidence back, and finding true loveIt's over--and it really hurts. But as unbelievable as it may seem when you are in the throes of heartache, you can move past your breakup. Forget about trying to win your ex back. Forget about losing yourself and trying to make this person love you. Starting today, this breakup is the best time to change your life for the better, inside and out. Through her workshops and popular blog, Susan Elliott has helped thousands of people transform their love lives. Now in Getting Past Your Breakup, she'll help you put your energy back where it belongs--on you. Her plan includes:
- The rules of disengagement: how and why to go "no contact" with your ex
- How to work through grief, move past fear, and take back your life
- The secret to breaking the pattern of failed relationships
- What to do when you can't stop thinking about your ex, texting, calling, checking social networking sites, or driving by the house
Features
- Great product!
Top Reviews
Life Saverby HTBGriff (5 out of 5 stars)
April 13, 2018
I don't know where I heard about this book - the first days during the collapse of my marriage are all a blur. But I'm so thankful that, wherever I learned of Susan Elliott from, I gave her book a chance. Admittedly there were parts I wanted to ignore at first - no contact with someone you've loved and shared a life with for nearly 20 years seems impossible - but I knew what she was advising was what would ultimately be in my best interest. I've reread parts of this book over and over and over again - I've hi-lighted so many sections and go back to them even over a year later. Elliott directly teaches ways to heal yourself and find your self-worth again with affirmations, journaling, and her inventories. If you are finding yourself considering this book for your own use, you have my sympathies. I know first-hand how the end of a relationship hurts. This book will help you find your way back to yourself.
Excellent for anyone going through a life changing breakup
by HelloReese (5 out of 5 stars)
April 13, 2016
This is a great book for anyone going through a significant breakup. While the tagline to the title is a bit overly optimistic - "How to Turn a Devastating Loss into the Best Thing That Ever Happened to You" - the actual title of the book, "Getting Past Your Breakup," is a true description of the great compassion and advice offered in this book.
I very much enjoy the author's style, as it feels like a wise older sister, older brother, older cousin, or older friend is speaking directly to you, recognizing that you are going through hell, and are hurting terribly, but also gently giving you advice about how to move beyond your present state of misery, and start taking steps towards healing and re-entering the world of the living - stronger, and healthier. A significant topic in the book is why it is essential to go "no contact" with your ex - no exceptions - and how to effectively go no contact if you happen to be in a circumstance where there is no way to completely avoid your ex, like if you have children together, or work together.
I didn't make my life changing breakup "the best thing that ever happened to me," through reading this book, but this book was great in helping me get over it and move on to better things.
A Must-Have Book to Process Grief and Loss from Broken Relationships
by Laura (5 out of 5 stars)
May 26, 2017
I bought this book after my boyfriend of seven years suddenly dumped me out of nowhere and I was devastated. I am so glad I found this book and Susan's companion blog, YouTube videos, and Facebook support group site to help me get past my breakup. This book contains so many useful tools to enable emotional healing, and provides specific examples of common setbacks such as recycling, the effects of unresolved grief, and avoiding the temptation to break the No-Contact Rule. The author has real life experience as a person who suffered failed relationships, as well as professional experience as a licensed therapist, that makes the advice in this book relatable and sensible. Susan's empathetic and practical advice makes this book a must-have for anyone in recovery over a breakup.
Everyone who is currently going through grief needs to read this
by Leandra (5 out of 5 stars)
November 17, 2018
This book has been by my side since my boyfriend and I broke up about a month and a half ago. When reading this book I know that I am not going through it alone. Each chapter has no bullsh*t advise for the reader and is very grounding. The author, Susan J. Elliott, is 100% honest in how you can create a better life for yourself without your ex. She explains the phases of grief, the importance of No Contact (NC), ways to perform self care, explanations as to why daily positive affirmations are so important in your life, and so much more! I have highlighted, bookmarked, and written down important points that I think would be helpful during this time of grief (and it has been helpful).
There is also the Relationship Inventory that the author walks you through to write out. It has helped me get out of the mindset that everything in the relationship was perfect and opened my eyes of how the relationship was and how he was towards me. It also allows for self-reflection. I see what I want to work on in order to better myself and to live a happier life on my own - without a partner.
There are times where I feel stuck some days and when I open up a part of a book that I need to review I get myself right back up and continue to push forward. There is also a Facebook Support Group that she briefly introduces in the book and any reader of the book is welcome to join it. The members of this blog are also so supportive. The members range in age and experience and they are all in different phases of the grieving process. Their advise has also helped me power through this difficult time in my life.
Please buy this book if you or anybody you know is going through a breakup and needs guidance. I found this book by chance and it has changed the way I view my past relationship as well as myself. I wish you good luck!
Don't just survive your breakup. Change your life.
by VMH ATX (5 out of 5 stars)
August 1, 2018
Buy this book. Buy it because you're sick and tired of feeling this way. Buy it because you know something has to change, and you sense that this all goes deeper than you realize, but the pain is so heavy that you don't even know where to start. Buy it because you appreciate the accessibility of an author who has spent her entire life building the wealth of knowledge and wisdom that is written in these pages - she learned this all herself, the hard way, navigating relationships with one toxic person after another with a relentless drive to better understand herself and her patterns. Buy this because you love the accessibility of an author who continues to blog and post videos long after having finished the book.
Almost every breakup book I sought out, during my darkest time, was total crap. Susan not only helps you to start to feel better, and sort through the mess, she challenges you to do the deep work. She guides you through new habits and behaviors that can actually change your life. Listen to what she says about going No Contact, about Affirmations, and beyond. Even if it feels awkward or foreign at first, and especially if your spirit rebels against it. Do it anyway. I don't mean this lightly: Susan's work has changed my life. Thank you Susan!
Worth so much more than it costs
by Lu (5 out of 5 stars)
January 20, 2019
As a person who has read more than my fair share of self-help books, who has had therapy with multiple therapists, and who is a doctoral psychologist who has provided therapy to others, I can definitively say this is THE best self-help book I've ever come across. And I say that as someone who has encountered some lousy books and therapists. This book and the author are rare gems. It is not just helpful for breakups, but for all problematic relationships and relationship patterns in one's life. It's not a fluffy, feel-good, sugar-coat-it type of book; it cuts straight to the point. It will force you to examine your unhealthy patterns and behaviors, and also provides practical, measurable steps and things you can DO, rather than flimsy platitudes or vague tips. One of the most unique parts is how it teaches you to create your own, effective, affirmations, something that I've never encountered before in a sea of b.s. affirmations on the internet or other resources that are generally meaningless and ineffective. It's important to know that this book focuses on YOU and getting YOU healthy. It is not a book designed to focus on your ex (i.e., if you want to analyze what or why they did something, or you want to get back with them). If that's what you're interested in, this IS NOT the book for you. If you're interested in centering your energy back to yourself and becoming a healthier person who improves their next and existing relationships, this IS the book for you. It also works best in conjunction with the other book (Getting Back Out There), the workbook (Getting Past Your Past), as well as other materials online. I've been using all of these materials together, and personally have found it to be better (and cheaper) than any therapist I've ever had! As a psychologist, I can confirm that Susan knows her stuff and you will feel like you're getting good therapy directly from her. I don't laud things lightly, so trust me when I say this book and the program have been life-saving life-changers, for me, and many others.
Read this in 2 days right after my breakup. Thank you.
by Bunny Trouble (5 out of 5 stars)
December 1, 2017
This book is an easy, how to guide. The author gives you hope. I purchased this book after my boyfriend (whom I thought was absolutely hands down The One) dumped me. I was so shocked, lost, hurt, rejected, confused, betrayed, sad, angry; it felt like the rejection came from nowhere! This book helps you pick yourself back up. It gives you goals, things to do and encourages you to focus on healing. Your heart is broken and you are in pain so it's incredibly important to nurse your wounds and focus on self-care.
I practice affirmations & positive self talk every day.
I write gratitude lists every day before going to bed ( my version of praying )
I have done no contact with him for the past 30 days (this part really really sucks btw)
I make sure to get out of the house every day - walk through the park, read this book at a coffee shop, ect.
Our lives happened before the relationship, and they will keep going even after someone we love has decided to leave us.
but what a great resource. If you're going through a break-up
by Erica S. (5 out of 5 stars)
January 29, 2016
So as I muddle through my husband's affair and other misgivings, I must assume that we probably won't reconcile our marriage. But oh my goodness this book. It's as if the book was written FOR AND ABOUT me. I am sooooo grateful that I found it. There's much introspection that needs to be done by the reader (and I'm only on page 30), but what a great resource. If you're going through a break-up, or its collateral damage do YOURSELF a favor and read it. You will not be sorry.
This Book is a real game changer! I read ...
by reneegab (5 out of 5 stars)
April 17, 2017
This Book is a real game changer! I read this as I was going through my recent breakup, and it has helped me in huge ways! First of all, it gave me something to do to be proactive! The journaling and affirmations have helped me deal with grief and stress, and move into a much more positive mindset. The relationship inventory and life inventory gave me a chance to look at my relationship and life in clear, simple terms and helped me to understand how my past has influenced where I am today, and where I want to go from here! It's been a tough couple of months, but this book has really helped me to get through it, and now I am reading the second book: Getting Back Out There, and I'm already coming up with a game plan for what I will do next!
Life changing book
by Stephanie K. (5 out of 5 stars)
October 2, 2017
This book really helped me get through a difficult breakup when I finally said, 'enough is enough' and I'm ready to break my relationship patterns and stop being miserable in horrible relationships over and over!! If you're willing to do the work, you can free yourself and move on to happier and healthier relationships. I made this declaration, read this book and did the work and four months later met my now husband who is all I could have hoped for. I'm not saying this is a miracle fix, but in my experience it was a key component to my growth and healing and helped me break free from my negative relationship patterns. This book is comforting and full of great information and tools. It helped me turn my pain into power. I am truly grateful for this book and ten years later still talk about it! I recommend this book to anyone going through a difficult breakup.
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