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It's Not Supposed to Be This Way: Finding Unexpected Strength When Disappointments Leave You Shattered Paperback – November 13, 2018
Purchase options and add-ons
- Print length264 pages
- LanguageEnglish
- PublisherThomas Nelson Inc
- Publication dateNovember 13, 2018
- Dimensions5.43 x 0.63 x 8.46 inches
- ISBN-101400210976
- ISBN-13978-1400210978
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From the brand
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Lysa deeply understands the heartache that comes with life-shattering circumstances. But she's also discovered that our hardships can be the divine appointments our souls need to radically encounter God.
Filled with Biblical truth, gut-honest vulnerability, and refreshing wit, Lysa's words will help you find redemption in every part of your story.
From the Publisher
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Customer Reviews |
4.8 out of 5 stars 595
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4.7 out of 5 stars 25,629
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4.8 out of 5 stars 4,662
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4.8 out of 5 stars 19,948
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4.7 out of 5 stars 5,807
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4.7 out of 5 stars 12,162
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Price | $12.99$12.99 | $16.28$16.28 | $12.36$12.36 | $14.65$14.65 | $13.66$13.66 | $9.61$9.61 |
Discover more titles from Lysa: | Lysa shows you what to do with your skepticism and distrust so you can heal from past betrayals and move forward with strength and resilience. | In Forgiving What You Can't Forget, join bestselling author Lysa TerKeurst as she helps you discover how to move on, make peace with painful memories, and create a life that's beautiful again. | In Good Boundaries and Goodbyes, Lysa helps you stop the dysfunction of unhealthy relationships by showing you biblical ways to set boundaries--and, when necessary, say goodbye--without losing the best of who you are. | What do you do when God’s timing seems questionable or hurtful? In It's Not Supposed to Be This Way, Lysa shows you how to live assured when life doesn't turn out the way you expected. | Lysa offers a safe place to share your disappointments, fresh biblical insight to get you through painful situations, and life-giving perspectives for living between Eden and eternity. | Do you ever feel left out, lonely, or less than? We've all been there. Join Lisa in Uninvited as she teaches you how to keep rejections in perspective and be better equipped to foster healthy connections in your relationships. |
Format: | Hardcover | Hardcover | Hardcover | Hardcover | Softcover | Softcover |
Product details
- Publisher : Thomas Nelson Inc; International Edition (November 13, 2018)
- Language : English
- Paperback : 264 pages
- ISBN-10 : 1400210976
- ISBN-13 : 978-1400210978
- Item Weight : 2.31 pounds
- Dimensions : 5.43 x 0.63 x 8.46 inches
- Best Sellers Rank: #40,894 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)
- Customer Reviews:
About the author
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Lysa TerKeurst is president of Proverbs 31 Ministries and the author of more than twenty-five books, including It’s Not Supposed to Be This Way and the #1 New York Times bestsellers Forgiving What You Can’t Forget and Uninvited. She writes from her family’s farm table and lives in North Carolina. Connect with her at www.LysaTerKeurst.com or on social media @LysaTerKeurst.
Customer reviews
Customer Reviews, including Product Star Ratings help customers to learn more about the product and decide whether it is the right product for them.
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Learn more how customers reviews work on AmazonCustomers say
Customers find the book inspiring and truthful. They praise the author's writing style as clear and easy to read. Readers describe the book as relatable and personal, offering a glimpse into their own experiences. The author is described as down-to-earth and open to sharing her struggles. Overall, customers find the book a quick and easy read that serves as a reminder of God's love and support.
AI-generated from the text of customer reviews
Customers find the book inspiring and encouraging. They say it provides Biblical truth and wisdom to help them stay strong. The author shares her own journey of pain and gives resources to help them through hard times. Readers describe the book as raw, real, and honest, touching them in every aspect.
"...Other times it is easier to open the book and search for the relevant pages, including chapter endings of “Going to the Well”, “Receive (a scripture)..." Read more
"Verses and prayers are also in the book." Read more
"This book does a great job at capturing the raw feelings we go through because of life’s disappointments, but does an even better job at equipping..." Read more
"...the same season or circumstances of hurt, but it still touched me in every aspect...." Read more
Customers appreciate the author's writing style. They find it clear, easy to read, and memorable. The book is relatable and honest, with biblical principles that help. Readers also mention that the author is down-to-earth and relatable to all life stages.
"...She writes in a manner that someone who has been a Christian for any length of time, whether new or seasoned, can grasp when in the midst of a trauma..." Read more
"...I felt like examples she has shown on this book, getting into details, was her putting the hurt, feelings, emotions, and everything from my soul..." Read more
"...the book, and the humor gives it spirit making it human and easy to relate to...." Read more
"This book is well written and has some powerful messages...." Read more
Customers appreciate the author's honesty. They say it's raw and real without being jaded or cynical. The book is described as truthful and full of grit. Readers praise the author for being transparent and honest about her own experiences.
"...She is honest, showing that bad things do happen to Christians even while believing that God is good...." Read more
"...This book is full of convicting, comforting, and necessary truths...." Read more
"...It is raw, real, honest and speaks to the good, bad and ugly that tends to surface when things aren't "supposed to be this way."..." Read more
"...If you want a book that will connect you to great biblical TRUTH, complete with deep spiritual insights, wonderful laugh out loud moments, and an..." Read more
Customers find the book relatable. They say it provides a personal look at their own story with lessons and scriptures to back them up. The experience is presented in the moment, and the insight provides tools for application. Readers mention that the book encourages, edifies, and reminds them of their greatness. While dealing with a heavy subject, it is relevant to their lives.
"...This book is full of convicting, comforting, and necessary truths...." Read more
"...What a blessing it has been. There were many AH HA moments and many tears shed. The author is truly an inspiration!..." Read more
"...Each chapter includes a personal story, practical advise, and a section called “Going to the Well”...." Read more
"...story then don't look here...this book is purely for encouraging, edifying, and reminding us of our great God and his love for us...." Read more
Customers find the book easy to read and a quick read for difficult times. They say it's a must-read for anyone facing difficulties, especially women. The book comes at the perfect time for them and they love reading the words of Lysa.
"...This one is my least favorite. It was a slow start and good middle but the end just felt like a collection of copy and paste of scriptures...." Read more
"Amazing book every woman should read, totally worth the time you’ll come out refreshed and renewed and full of love and grace and confidence...." Read more
"...I got her this book to read and use with her daily Bible reading. She LOVES it!" Read more
"This book is a quick and easy read and at the same time reaches into the depths of the despair everyone encounters at some point...." Read more
Customers appreciate the author's down-to-earth writing style and relatable voice. They find her honest in sharing personal struggles and find the words helpful.
"...Regarding the audiobook, it is read by the author...." Read more
"...There were many AH HA moments and many tears shed. The author is truly an inspiration!..." Read more
"I am reading this book as part of a Christian book club. The author is very open and honest when sharing her personal struggles, which encourages..." Read more
"I love anything this author writes...." Read more
Customers find the book comforting and motivating. They say it's relatable and helps them feel normal. Readers also mention it's supportive, honest, and inspiring.
"...This book is full of convicting, comforting, and necessary truths...." Read more
"...God was wrapping my cold, scared heart in the coziest, warmest, softest blanket and giving it the biggest, tightest, squeeziest hug!..." Read more
"...Lysa is so real, so raw and you feel as she feels. I have shared this book and excerpts of it with so many friends...." Read more
"...It was just what I needed right now, it calmed my soul, it put me closer to God's words and promises, and i make me believe that everything that..." Read more
Customers appreciate the author's vulnerability. They find the book authentic and helpful, with tips on trusting God. The author teaches how to live for eternal life, not the ways of the world.
"...Her vulnerability is refreshing, her wisdom inspired by the Lord. “Disappointment isn’t proof that God is withholding good from us...." Read more
"...Life is precious from conception to natural death, what I've learned and hope to share with those around me is that God can take out disappointments..." Read more
"...in my own darkness and despair again, for once I have regained back my will to live and fight harder then ever before to keep pushing and If it was..." Read more
"...should read, totally worth the time you’ll come out refreshed and renewed and full of love and grace and confidence...." Read more
Reviews with images
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Top reviews from the United States
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- Reviewed in the United States on November 21, 2019This is one of the best Christian non-fiction / inspirational books I have studied this year! Lysa TerKeurst is a Christian woman, wife, mom, ministry leader, book and Bible study author who found herself in three major life crises in a short time. The situations highlighted in this book to show the power and love of God when we endure similar – or entirely different – circumstances that just weren’t supposed to happen. Circumstances that He can and does use for our good.
The author takes us through her feelings and faith challenges she experienced as a result of those situations, and how she wrestled through with scripture, prayer, and reliance on the Lord. Her vulnerability is refreshing, her wisdom inspired by the Lord. “Disappointment isn’t proof that God is withholding good from us. Sometimes it’s His way of leading us home.” (pg. 5)
Lysa doesn’t mince words. She does not minimize the Lord in any way, rather, He is everything! She is honest, showing that bad things do happen to Christians even while believing that God is good. She writes in a manner that someone who has been a Christian for any length of time, whether new or seasoned, can grasp when in the midst of a trauma. There are stories of people from scripture, and parts of her own life. The wisdom imparted comes from serious wrestling in a walk with God through painful disappointments. I could see myself in some of her feelings and reactions – not in circumstances like she was experiencing, but things going on in my own life. It isn’t the situations that are front and center, it is how we can learn to respond despite times that simply weren’t what that should have been.
Those responses may sound overly simple to those not going through a trauma but are profound to the person who is trying to put one foot in front of the other for one more day. There are two ways we can get through – with God, or giving in to our flawed desires. One quote that is important is “We must set our minds and our hearts on things above by choosing to remember God’s words, repeat God’s words, and believe God’s word about us.” (pg. 65)
I listened to the audiobook and read the print copy while doing the associated Bible study (and purchased the e-book), and I feel it is a valuable resource to the person going through struggles or the friend of someone struggling through hard times. Don’t compare the author’s situations to yours; instead, compare your reactions, feelings, and responses. I very much like the writer’s approach to seeking God, wrestling, praying, and getting into scripture. Our responses in times of crisis are vital to how we live our lives from those times forward.
Regarding the audiobook, it is read by the author. I felt in many ways as if we were sitting in her kitchen over coffee or tea from the writing style and simply hearing her word sin her voice. Why did I get three formats? Because some things I learn better by repetitive hearing. Other times it is easier to open the book and search for the relevant pages, including chapter endings of “Going to the Well”, “Receive (a scripture)”, “Reflect”, and prayer. Back sections include scripture and helps for situations.
I highly recommend this unique and timely book to Christians who are going through trauma of any kind and want to know that God is still in control and appreciate solid biblical teaching.
- Reviewed in the United States on February 18, 2025Verses and prayers are also in the book.
- Reviewed in the United States on December 5, 2024This book does a great job at capturing the raw feelings we go through because of life’s disappointments, but does an even better job at equipping us for the emotional, mental and spiritual battle. Loved there was no judgment, guilt, or religiosity… just pure compassion, empathy and Scriptures to empower us through the journey.
- Reviewed in the United States on March 4, 2021I just finished this book after starting it on February 22nd, 2021. I am in awe about how touched I was by this book. Going through a rough season currently, I was merely searching for books to occupy my time with. I stumbled upon this not knowing anything about this author Lysa TerKeurst.
I felt like examples she has shown on this book, getting into details, was her putting the hurt, feelings, emotions, and everything from my soul onto the pages itself. We aren't even going through the same season or circumstances of hurt, but it still touched me in every aspect. I was taking photo after photo of page after page and sending it to some of my friends. Either as encouragement or to emphasize how it was SPEAKING TO ME. It's unbelievable. I even met up with a friend last night after reading the book and although I have the tendency to not want to share books due to them being returned in terrible condition or lost... I felt THE URGE the share the book with my friend immediately.
Lysa really shifted my perspectives on how to see struggle and pain. The way she ends her chapters are extremely helpful because they legitimately re-iterate EVERYTHING I was trying to keep a mental note of when I was reading through them. In addition, they have bible verses to look back at, as well as legitimate questions that we should ask ourselves. She encourages us not to think on the surface level of our feelings and situations.
I was so encouraged reading this book and I highly, highly, highly recommend anyone to read it—with an open mind! Don't think about how you cannot relate to her situation of divorce (as I am not even married myself!) but know that it doesn't matter what place of hurt you came from, you are not alone. And your pain does not have to define you. I shared the same feeling she had about my experience molding me into a more compassionate person and wanting to help anyone I can, knowing the hurt they may be feeling. The way she ends the book with the dialogue also had me in tears feeling like what was written was about me.
I'll buy this book as many times for as many people if need be.
Top reviews from other countries
- L.Reviewed in Canada on June 28, 2023
5.0 out of 5 stars A very good book
This author has been through a few thing in life and shares in an open honest and encouraging way. If you are struggling with hard or dark times, this book is worth the investment and so is her devotional book “Seeing Beautiful Again.”
Catch a couple teaching On YouTube if you are still not sure. I am working through several of her books and am finding them to be very helpful and sometimes painfully helpful!
- Laura JaneReviewed in the United Kingdom on October 25, 2021
5.0 out of 5 stars just what I needed
Such an amazing author. I love the way she writes and relates to her readers. Amazing book I’d read it all again tomorrow!
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KarlaBReviewed in Mexico on August 12, 2019
5.0 out of 5 stars Excelente
Es una hermosa herramienta de estudio
- Amazon CustomerReviewed in Germany on May 10, 2019
5.0 out of 5 stars Very good book on dealing with disappointment
This book is authentic and raw and full of biblical truth. The reflection questions in each chapter challenge one to introspection and the words equip one with the truth of God as you walk in the shatter of life. Thank you, Lysa, for sharing the beauty that God is able to bring out of the dust of our lives.
- DianaReviewed in Singapore on June 22, 2021
2.0 out of 5 stars Buy if you want to be reminded of the rhetorics
There are so many raving reviews that I bought this book, wanting to heal, from many traumatic experiences and a recent horrifying experience that left me financial loss and and trust in humanity. I picked this up with an open mind but chapter after chapter, I read things which I'm confident we already know or have heard from sermons or closed ones. You know, the usual advice one would have given. I give this two stars, at best, and will move on to other Christian writers.