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Ed Welch
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When People Are Big and God Is Small: Overcoming Peer Pressure, Codependency, and the Fear of Man (Resources for Changing Lives) Paperback – June 1, 1997

by Edward T. Welch (Author)
4.7 out of 5 stars 1,765 ratings
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Overly concerned about what people think of you? Welch uncovers the spiritual dimension of people-pleasing and points the way through a true knowledge of God, ourselves, and others.
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  1. Print length
    256 pages
  2. Language
    English
  3. Publisher
    Presbyterian & Reformed Pub Co
  4. Publication date
    June 1, 1997
  5. Dimensions
    5.5 x 0.75 x 8.5 inches
  6. ISBN-10
    0875526004
  7. ISBN-13
    978-0875526003
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From the Publisher

Customer Reviews
Price
Pages 216 192 320 88 40 40

Editorial Reviews

Review

"Ed Welch is a good physician of the soul. This book is enlightening, convicting, and encouraging. I highly recommend it." --Jerry Bridges

"Need people less. Love people more. That's the author's challenge. . . . He's talking about a tendency to hold other people in awe, to be controlled and mastered by them, to depend on them for what God alone can give. . . . [Welch] proposes an antidote: the fear of God . . . the believer's response to God's power, majesty and not least his mercy." --Dallas Morning News

"Refreshingly biblical. . . . brimming with helpful, readable, practical insight." --John F. MacArthur Jr.

About the Author

Edward T. Welch (PhD, University of Utah) serves both the Christian Counseling and Educational Foundation (CCEF) and Westminster Theological Seminary. At CCEF, he is director of counseling and academic dean, as well as a counselor and faculty member. At Westminster, he is professor of practical theology. He is author of Blame It on the Brain and When People Are Big and God Is Small and has contributed to several other books and journals, including the Journal of Psychology and Christianity.

Product details

  • Publisher ‏ : ‎ Presbyterian & Reformed Pub Co; 32132nd edition (June 1, 1997)
  • Language ‏ : ‎ English
  • Paperback ‏ : ‎ 256 pages
  • ISBN-10 ‏ : ‎ 0875526004
  • ISBN-13 ‏ : ‎ 978-0875526003
  • Item Weight ‏ : ‎ 9.6 ounces
  • Dimensions ‏ : ‎ 5.5 x 0.75 x 8.5 inches
  • Customer Reviews:
    4.7 out of 5 stars 1,765 ratings

About the author

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Ed Welch

Ed Welch

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Edward T. Welch, MDiv, PhD, is a licensed psychologist and faculty member at the Christian Counseling & Educational Foundation (CCEF). He earned a PhD in counseling (neuropsychology) from the University of Utah and has a Master of Divinity degree from Biblical Theological Seminary. Ed has been counseling for over thirty years and has written extensively on the topics of depression, fear, and addictions. His biblical counseling books include Shame Interrupted; When People Are Big and God Is Small; Addictions: A Banquet in the Grave; Depression: Looking Up from the Stubborn Darkness; Crossroads: A Step-by-Step Guide Away from Addiction; Running Scared: Fear, Worry, and the God of Rest; When I Am Afraid: A Step-by-Step Guide Away from Fear and Anxiety; Side by Side: Walking with Others in Wisdom and Love; and A Small Book about a Big Problem: Meditations on Anger, Patience, and Peace.

Customer reviews

4.7 out of 5 stars
1,765 global ratings

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Customers say

Customers find the book informative and well-written, with rich biblical content that leads readers to study the Bible. Moreover, the book offers many insights into life and helps readers examine their hearts, making it a powerful and practical resource. However, the writing style receives mixed reactions, with some finding it well-explained while others note it can be hard to follow at times.

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126 customers mention "Readability"126 positive0 negative

Customers find the book enjoyable to read and very informative, with one customer noting it is to the point.

"...It's hard to not see yourself in this book. Practical and helpful and always pointing back to scripture...." Read more

"...I am starting through it for the third time soon because it is so fantastic...." Read more

"I love how practical and to the point this book is. It really challenges me in thinking about why I do what I do...." Read more

"This book was super helpful in breaking down exactly what it is that I struggle with and the different ways it can show in my life, and provided a..." Read more

118 customers mention "Enlightenedness"114 positive4 negative

Customers find the book enlightening, offering insights into life and making them examine their own hearts, with several noting how it leads them to study the Bible.

"...The flow of the book is great. Topics clearly connect to the next. I had many "yes yes! That's me." Type experiences while reading this book...." Read more

"...But it is a joyful gratitude that permeates it. I'm so grateful for the keen awareness I have when I am being fearful of things that are not God...." Read more

"...Is it out of fear of others or obedience to God? Very challenging on a personal level." Read more

"...Further, he offers biblically based solutions to the many ways "fear of man" affects us and our lives...." Read more

29 customers mention "Biblical content"29 positive0 negative

Customers appreciate the book's biblical content, describing it as excellent and rich in truths, with one customer noting its clear articulation of theological concepts.

"...This is a well-written, gospel-centered book that will help you to refine your understanding of the fear of God." Read more

"...without growing in the knowledge of God...through the inerrant and infallible Word of God, the Bible. Thank you Mr. Welch...." Read more

"...It is unapologetic in its clear articulation of biblical truths (ones that we are often resistant to) and sends a radically different message from..." Read more

"...Welch leaves no room for self-exaltation , he beautifully calls Gods people to take up Gods call to "fear Him only" and not man...." Read more

13 customers mention "Power"13 positive0 negative

Customers find the book powerful and practical, with one describing it as a must-have addition to their library.

"...It's hard to not see yourself in this book. Practical and helpful and always pointing back to scripture...." Read more

"I love how practical and to the point this book is. It really challenges me in thinking about why I do what I do...." Read more

"...A fear so great because our God is so great, so loving, so powerful, so forgiving and so enlightening that it is beyond understanding...." Read more

"...The author makes it plain, simple and practical as the truth exposes the false idols and fears in ones life...." Read more

26 customers mention "Writing style"18 positive8 negative

Customers have mixed opinions about the writing style of the book, with some finding it well written and easy to read, while others note it is matter-of-fact and well-explained.

"...Information is presented in an easy to understand way. Clear explanations and warning signs we can all relate to. The flow of the book is great...." Read more

"...This is a well-written, gospel-centered book that will help you to refine your understanding of the fear of God." Read more

"...I couldn’t even finish this book due to the utter lack of grace the author has when presenting various examples of people struggling with past..." Read more

"...The entire book is written in a very matter of fact, black and white manner that often oversimplifies real life situations...." Read more

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Top reviews from the United States

  • Jessie L. Young
    5.0 out of 5 stars You know you struggle with people pleasing, read this book today!
    Reviewed in the United States on April 5, 2017
    Verified Purchase
    This book has helped me tramendeously not only to better understand myself but to understand others. Information is presented in an easy to understand way. Clear explanations and warning signs we can all relate to. The flow of the book is great. Topics clearly connect to the next. I had many "yes yes! That's me." Type experiences while reading this book. It's hard to not see yourself in this book. Practical and helpful and always pointing back to scripture. I think we all struggle in one way or another with people pleasing. This book lays it out and gives reasons why it's not ok and reasons why we don't have to be held captive by the desire to please others more than God. A must read. One of the best books I've read ever. I recommend this book to everyone.
    3 people found this helpful
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  • Mateo
    5.0 out of 5 stars Truly A Must Read!
    Reviewed in the United States on February 13, 2016
    Verified Purchase
    I don't have enough time to write the quality of review that this book deserves. No book can ever replace Scripture, and reading it alone is sufficient. Yet God has gifted certain men to put the understanding He has given them of Scripture on paper and allowed it to bless us with the insight He has given them. This is one of those books.

    Most people have a very basic understanding of the fear of man. We experience one form of it often when presented an opportunity to proclaim the Gospel. Even those that boldly stand on the corners and preach to the passing crowds will often tell you about the butterflies they get prior to starting their proclamation.

    However, this book will open your eyes to a number of other ways you may fear man. I did not understand that much of my life was controlled by that fear. I am grateful for the people that kept on pressing me to read this.

    It is hard for me to read most books cover to cover. It's easy to read three or four chapters, and then skip to the end to see what the final diagnosis or recommendation is. This is not a book you should or will want to do that with. I am starting through it for the third time soon because it is so fantastic. Everything he teaches is put on the bottom shelf and you don't have to be a scholar to understand it, but there is so much packed into this that you either need to go super-slow and meditate on both the Scripture he references and the point he's making, or go through it once thoughtfully and come back to study the points that pertain more to your situation.

    Either way, this is a very worthwhile study. I can't recommend it enough.
    76 people found this helpful
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  • Linda K. Anderson
    5.0 out of 5 stars Monumental Paradigm Shift
    Reviewed in the United States on August 21, 2016
    Verified Purchase
    I'm probably going to retread this book after I write this review because it has been so transformational in my thinking.
    I am the children's ministry director at my church. I have made the observation that the perspective of the curriculum makes a huge difference in theology for our kids. When we focus on the Bible characters and how we can be like them or glean nuggets of how to follow God from their stories, the kids get mired in works-based theology. No matter how much we would point to the cross, the kids would hear works. Then we changed our curriculum that had a solid God focus: Who is God? What is He like? How should I act towards Him? This perspective started a liberation from works for our kids. But I could never figure out why.
    This book really explains why: we were finally teaching the right and proper fear of God. When we spend a whole year camping out on His attributes, we were looking at Him with the joyful fear and awe that frees us from the fear of everything else.
    To say that I have been convicted by this book is an understatement. But it is a joyful gratitude that permeates it. I'm so grateful for the keen awareness I have when I am being fearful of things that are not God. I am learning, through the Holy Spirit's power, to let go of that fear as one lays aside a heavy weight I never knew was there. The freedom is immense. Being free to not fear and love deeply instead is glorious--it is something I have searched for for many years. I'm so glad that God has so graciously revealed Himself to me in this way. Simply monumental.
    81 people found this helpful
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  • Debby
    5.0 out of 5 stars Fear God not man
    Reviewed in the United States on August 15, 2023
    Verified Purchase
    I love how practical and to the point this book is. It really challenges me in thinking about why I do what I do. Is it out of fear of others or obedience to God? Very challenging on a personal level.
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  • A.Ch
    4.0 out of 5 stars Eye-Opening
    Reviewed in the United States on November 29, 2018
    Verified Purchase
    I thought I didn't need to read this book because I thought, "Oh, this is just some self-help book, and I don't need that." However, I am very thankful that I did read it.
    We live in a world and culture in which people place far too much emphasis on what others think. We often hold back and refuse to put ourselves out there or try new things because we fear failure and being mocked and being isolated from a group–simply put, people and their opinions of us control us. Ed Welch wisely helps readers see just how prominent the "fear of man" issue is in our lives. He illumines us to the reality that we have made people big and God small. However, he doesn't just identify a problem and bring it to the forefront of readers' minds; instead, he gets to the root of why we make people "big" in our lives, using biblically informed principles. Further, he offers biblically based solutions to the many ways "fear of man" affects us and our lives. Ultimately, Welch contends that the way to combat "fear of man" is by fearing God. He does not mean fear God in the sort of "God might strike me dead at any second" kind of fear. Rather, he means learning to view God with the holy reverence and awe that the Sovereign of the universe deserves. Understanding that God is the Almighty demands respect and obedience. People are to delight in obeying the Lord, which results in the fullness of joy at His right hand and frees us from being enslaved to the opinions and standards the ever-changing culture.
    Since I believe almost ever person today deals with the fear of man in one way or another, I highly recommend this book to all people seeking to live a life to the glory of God alone.
    19 people found this helpful
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Top reviews from other countries

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  • Pollyanna
    4.0 out of 5 stars Worth buying
    Reviewed in Australia on August 6, 2021
    Verified Purchase
    Worth buying it. I feel like everyone should read this book.
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  • Becky
    5.0 out of 5 stars Life changer
    Reviewed in Canada on October 24, 2019
    Verified Purchase
    Easy to read, yet life changing!!
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  • Jahmila
    5.0 out of 5 stars Amazing book
    Reviewed in the United Kingdom on January 10, 2022
    Verified Purchase
    It was talking directly to me lol praise God. It’s a great book which gets to the crux of the matter about anxiety etc.
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  • Marcos Luz
    5.0 out of 5 stars This book brings God back to his place and people down to theirs...
    Reviewed in Brazil on July 6, 2022
    Verified Purchase
    The Old Testament indicates that we stand at the crossroads between fear of others and fear of God. The road leading to the fear of man may be expressed in terms of favoritism, wanting others to think well of you, fearing exposure by them, or being overwhelmed by their perceived physical power. When these fears are not combated with the fear of the Lord, the consequences can be devastating. But when God is given his rightful place in our lives, old bonds can be shattered.

    Think about Jesus’ exhortation: “Do not be afraid of those who kill the body but cannot kill the soul. Rather, be afraid of the One who can destroy both soul and body in hell.” (Matt. 10:28).

    Individualism, at first, only saps the virtues of public life; but, in the long run, it attacks and destroys all others, and is at length absorbed in downright selfishness. Selfishness is a vice as old as the world... individualism is of democratic origin. — Alexis De Tocqueville

    the enemies

    The problem we encounter in our quest to know and fear the Lord as he ought to be feared is that we have three prominent adversaries. The world, our own flesh, and the Devil conspire to elevate other people (or what we can get from them) over God.

    needs

    person looks like this: 1. Our basic shape is that of a receptacle — a cup — that holds psychic needs. 2. We have a long list of psychic needs, but these needs tend to cluster around the basic needs for love and significance. 3. When these needs are not met, we are in a deficit, and so we feel empty. 4. We must be careful who fills these needs. Either we can look to people, or we can look to Christ.
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  • Carmen Carvalho
    5.0 out of 5 stars Maravilhoso
    Reviewed in Brazil on December 30, 2021
    Verified Purchase
    Se você quer aprender sobre o temor do Senhor e o temor dos homens, se quer entender o significado de Provérbios 9:10 "O temor do Senhor é o princípio da sabedoria, e o conhecimento do Santo a prudência". Este livro é para você. Ótima reflexão.
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