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Grieving the Death of a Mother Paperback – February 14, 2003

by Harold Ivan Smith (Author)
4.6 out of 5 stars 328 ratings
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Written by a grief counselor and educator, this book is for those who have loved and lost their mother.

Losing a mother is a difficult transition in life. No matter the status of the relationship, grieving the loss is a process -- one that sometimes begins before the physical loss has occurred. Drawing on his own experience of loss, as well as those of others, Harold Ivan Smith guides readers through their grief, from the process of dying through the acts of remembering and honoring a mother after her death. This book provides a way forward.

By shifting the grief process from something to rush through, Smith encourages readers to embrace their grief as a natural response to loss and to give themselves time to work through the sadness, pain, memories and reality of living without Mom. All of us will experience the loss of our mother's at some point. A mother's last breath inevitably changes us. Through wise counsel, Smith speaks gently to those who have gone through this loss and helps those who are yet to face it.

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  1. Part of series
    Grieving the Death of
  2. Print length
    144 pages
  3. Language
    English
  4. Publisher
    Fortress Press
  5. Publication date
    February 14, 2003
  6. Dimensions
    5.5 x 0.5 x 8.5 inches
  7. ISBN-10
    0806643471
  8. ISBN-13
    978-0806643472
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From the brand

Editorial Reviews

From the Publisher

Features:

--an accessible, comprehensive guide to coping with the loss of one's mother

--draws upon the author's own experience and that of many others

--author is a leading, nationally known grief counselor and seminar leader

About the Author

Harold Ivan Smith is the author of many books including On Grieving the Death of a Father, Grieving the Death of a Friend, Singles Ask and I Wish Someone Understood My Divorce. A former funeral director, he is a member of the Association for Death Education and Counseling, and leader of seminars on grief and spirituality. He lives in Kansas City, Missouri.

Product details

  • Publisher ‏ : ‎ Fortress Press; 1st edition (February 14, 2003)
  • Language ‏ : ‎ English
  • Paperback ‏ : ‎ 144 pages
  • ISBN-10 ‏ : ‎ 0806643471
  • ISBN-13 ‏ : ‎ 978-0806643472
  • Item Weight ‏ : ‎ 6.4 ounces
  • Dimensions ‏ : ‎ 5.5 x 0.5 x 8.5 inches
  • Customer Reviews:
    4.6 out of 5 stars 328 ratings

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Harold Ivan Smith

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Customer reviews

4.6 out of 5 stars
328 global ratings

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Customers say

Customers find the book helpful during times of grief, confirming their emotions and providing comfort. The book receives positive feedback for its sentimentality and appropriate content for mature readers. The story quality receives mixed reactions, with some enjoying the personal stories while others find it repetitive.

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66 customers mention "Helpfulness"59 positive7 negative

Customers find the book helpful during times of grief, confirming their emotions and providing encouragement.

"...I, myself, am an atheist yet I found the prayers in this text helpful in terms of the sentimental value the words held and found optimism within..." Read more

"...The subject, and thoughts produced are so intense, and yet somehow calming, I prefer to injest it, rather than just read it...." Read more

"...He paints vivid word pictures that express deep feelings and he helps the reader identify emotions and process grief in a healthy way...." Read more

"...This author allows the reader to grieve, reflect, forgive ourself for mistakes and rejoice in all the things we did right...." Read more

5 customers mention "Sentimentality"5 positive0 negative

Customers appreciate the sentimentality of the book, with one mentioning how it brought back memories and another noting how it cheered them up.

"...I found the prayers in this text helpful in terms of the sentimental value the words held and found optimism within them...." Read more

"...reader to grieve, reflect, forgive ourself for mistakes and rejoice in all the things we did right...." Read more

"...Shed many a tear and smiled as I had memories that I thought I had lost. This is a definite must read!" Read more

"...It both cheered me up but also provided reassurance during the waves of grief that wave over you." Read more

3 customers mention "Adult content"3 positive0 negative

Customers find the book appropriate for mature readers, with one mentioning it is great for adult children.

"...But I think this book would be appropriate for any mature person (say over 25ish) who lost a mother for any reason...." Read more

"...helped me cope and understand I was not alone and it was okay to be an adult child. So thank you." Read more

"Great book for adult children!..." Read more

11 customers mention "Story quality"6 positive5 negative

Customers have mixed reactions to the book's stories, with some enjoying the personal narratives while others find them repetitive and disappointing.

"...It was an amazing journey. I am writing my own books...." Read more

"...I could relate to a lot of scenrios in this book, but it was very repetitive and I disliked a lot of the "boring" old fashioned stories...." Read more

"...Insightful. Many real, heartfelt stories...." Read more

"It was quite a struggle to get through this book. Much of the contents are the author's personal musings and poems, mixed with historical antidotes...." Read more

Top reviews from the United States

  • Falgorian
    5.0 out of 5 stars Fantastic read for the motherless adult orphaned child
    Reviewed in the United States on September 30, 2015
    Verified Purchase
    I never leave reviews but I got this book today and read it from cover to cover today. My mom passed away on February 2014 and it was all of a sudden (stroke). I grew up in a single parent household so I didn't have a father to turn to for comfort, I had to figure it all out in a weird way, and I still am. I wasn't able to process it all so quickly. I had many "what if I had....." questions lingering in my mind. I thought I could benefit from this text by providing some additional helpful insight into what I had felt, am feeling, and what was to be felt in the coming years. The best part of reading this is that it wasn't just talking about the authors mother, there are many mothers spoken of in terms of what they might say, their personalities, their knowledge. I laughed and cried (mostly cried), thinking to myself when my mom would tell me something and I'd think in my head, "nobody else's mother says this type of thing" and I laughed at how wrong I was when I read other moms saying the exact same thing, but also cried. I've definitely gained insight in knowing that grieving has no time limit. I, myself, am an atheist yet I found the prayers in this text helpful in terms of the sentimental value the words held and found optimism within them. I can't ever go back in time to tell my mom I miss her and loved her, but I do have the opportunity to be a better man for it, and even when my mom is no longer with me, she's still teaching me how to live......
    42 people found this helpful
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  • Toni Buys
    5.0 out of 5 stars Great help for grieving
    Reviewed in the United States on July 23, 2024
    Verified Purchase
    I bought this book in 2004 when my mom died. I bought 4 copies to send to the 4 daughters of my friend that died recently. Grieving is tough especially when you lose your mom.
    Helpful
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  • R. Atkins
    5.0 out of 5 stars Loss of a Mother - the book to help you through it
    Reviewed in the United States on January 1, 2011
    Verified Purchase
    A friend gave me a copy of Grieving the Death of a Mother. I found it so helpful, I bought a copy for my brother. He is 38 and I am 42.

    My mother died after a lifelong battle with Cancer. But I think this book would be appropriate for any mature person (say over 25ish) who lost a mother for any reason.

    The book it written by a man, and even though I am a woman, I can see where this book would be great for men. Particularly those men who can't express, or even understand, their feelings. However, I too am moved by this book. I think this may be the only book I will need on the subject.

    It's a gentle, but driving book. It has been extremely helpful in allowing me express and get in touch with what is in my heart, but for which I haven't words. Grief, particularly of ones Mother, is different from all other losses I have encountered, and I have had my fair share of loss!

    The book is formatted in such a way one could either read it in an afternoon, or paragraph by paragraph, which has been my method. The subject, and thoughts produced are so intense, and yet somehow calming, I prefer to injest it, rather than just read it.

    My brother and I are going through the book together, but I could certainly go through it with a spouse or friend. I tend to read it in private because it does often bring me to tears, or outright crying at times. Then, we call each other and discuss it.

    I would HIGHLY recommend this book!
    9 people found this helpful
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  • Amazon Customer
    4.0 out of 5 stars Helpful…
    Reviewed in the United States on December 15, 2023
    Verified Purchase
    I’m reading this before I’ve actually lost my Mom…Sometimes it’s easier knowing others have gone before, and made it out the other side.
    Helpful
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  • Charlotte A. Miller
    5.0 out of 5 stars Excellent book to help you process the loss of your Mother
    Reviewed in the United States on April 3, 2021
    Verified Purchase
    I love the way that Harold Ivan Smith writes. He paints vivid word pictures that express deep feelings and he helps the reader identify emotions and process grief in a healthy way. I first discovered his writings almost 20 years ago when our 17-yr-old son died. They were helpful to me on so many levels. My favorite book of his is A DECEMBERED GRIEF but his books on grieving the loss of a father and grieving the loss of a mother will be added to my favorites list now. It’s been a little over a year since my mother died, and 2 years since my Daddy went to Heaven. I read these books to help me process my grief in a healthy way. Our grief ministry has shared them both with many others who are on grief journeys of their own. As someone who has both experienced grief and tried to encourage others in their grief journey, I highly recommend any book written by Harold Ivan Smith on grief.
    4 people found this helpful
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  • Settingapenname
    5.0 out of 5 stars A balm to my grieving heart
    Reviewed in the United States on October 11, 2017
    Verified Purchase
    Reading through this book the past 4 months since my mother passed away has been like a balm to my grieving heart. The author writes from his own experience and incorporates a flowing variety of others who have walked the same journey of losing their mother. Many times I have stopped readying to cry and count my own blessings that my family did their best for our own mom. I have given this book to my own sister as she has struggled to grieve her own loss because we all grieve differently. This author allows the reader to grieve, reflect, forgive ourself for mistakes and rejoice in all the things we did right. You can pick up this book and start to ready in any chapter or section and feel comforted. I highly recommend this book to anyone who is grieving the loss of a mother. I certainly will have this book in my library until I die because grief has no clear ending point. It just hits you when you least expect it. It is a normal part of life.
    30 people found this helpful
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  • Boymom, RN
    3.0 out of 5 stars Book was a slow painful read.
    Reviewed in the United States on December 6, 2012
    Verified Purchase
    My mom passed away suddenly at age 62 from a kidney infection that went septic. I am 28 yrs old. It was traumatic to my sisters and I. I am an ICU RN and knew all too much medically what was going on. I have been having a hard time- panic attacks, anger, severe lack of sleep, unable to complete my days at work in patient care.
    I was looking for something to help me out.
    I love reading long books. I read quickly. I often finish books the same day I start them. I had to keep putting this book down and walking away. I don't think it helped me much. If anything, I FORCED myself to read it.
    It may have helped.. I don't know.
    I could relate to a lot of scenrios in this book, but it was very repetitive and I disliked a lot of the "boring" old fashioned stories. (I am referring to the stories from Teddy Roosevelt etc. I found them unrelateable) Sorry, I hope I am not offending anyone. I think I need a book that is a bit "younger" minded.

    If it helped me, It was while my sisters and I were going through some of my moms things. It helped me to be more understanding of our different grief I guess...
    4 people found this helpful
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Top reviews from other countries

  • James York
    5.0 out of 5 stars Great help
    Reviewed in the United Kingdom on March 15, 2015
    Verified Purchase
    This book is well worth while reading. Especially immediately upon the loss of a mother. Helped me a lot.
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  • Belinda Burston
    5.0 out of 5 stars I recommend Grieving the Death of A Mother as a gift ...
    Reviewed in Canada on May 5, 2016
    Verified Purchase
    I have found all of Harold Ivan Smith's resources helpful in the grieving process. It may be several years after a close friend or family member's death, but it is never too late to grieve and remember--grief has its own timetable. I recommend Grieving the Death of A Mother as a gift to people experiencing this special loss.
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  • Floosie
    5.0 out of 5 stars Well written
    Reviewed in the United Kingdom on January 25, 2016
    Verified Purchase
    Good book in a subject that should be widely covered but isn't. Emotional read.
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  • Anonymous
    5.0 out of 5 stars Five Stars
    Reviewed in Canada on April 30, 2015
    Verified Purchase
    Grief is experienced so differently by everyone. I found this book helpful in beginning my journey.
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  • Gloria C.
    5.0 out of 5 stars Good book
    Reviewed in Canada on February 1, 2013
    Verified Purchase
    A wonderful book. I would recommend this book to anyone that has lost their Mom.It gave me great comfort to read this book.
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