I love that this book was written by a man. It gave me a lot of insight into my HUSBAND as well as my boys (I have three--and no girls, so there's a lot of testosterone around here!) Mr. Johnson does a great job of writing TO females ABOUT males. He uses specific examples of behaviors that frustrate most wives/moms, and then he explains them. You don't get the feeling that he is offering up excuses for boys. He explains, and then gives suggestions on how to use it to your advantage.
One example: He talks about how women want to have serious talks with eye contact, etc. That makes boys nervous and they shut down. He suggested talking to them while they are a little occupied. I started hanging out in the driveway with my 10 year old, rebounding his basketball shots, and I was amazed at the things he'd open up about. At first I just listened to whatever was on his mind at the moment, but quickly I would bring up things I wanted to talk about, and he'd respond!
There are a lot of things like that in the book. It is definitely worth buying--I've read it several times and made tons of notes to myself...I go back for a "refresher" once in a while.
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Completely contradicting & useless
I got this book and although I didn't necessarily agree with some of his opinions and religious comments, I figured I'd give it a chance to get a different viewpoint. Let's just say, it was really tough finishing it. Some parts were okay but I kept hoping it would change or get better and it just got worse and worse. It was extremely religious but that isn't even what turned me off - as a spiritual person, I can see the good in religion if presented in a healthy way but WOW, this was a lot. Most of the book was his own opinion on how to be a good man when he clearly has a whole lot of trauma of his own that he hasn't healed. Let's just say the entire theme of the book is him quoting other authors or stating facts like "data confirms that reinforcement is more beneficial than punishment but here's why I still think you should still punish your son". UM? I think at one point he talks about how men are angry and are born that way but then later says it's a secondary emotion because boys are told not to express any other emotions growing up ... AS HE IS LITERALLY saying men are "soft" and "passive" nowadays and need to toughen up, lol which is it? It's so strange and contradicting. He had absolutely no clue what he was talking about and only reflected back on his own kids, religion and the few women from his church that read his book before publishing. I'm surprised that there are women who actually read this and trust this man's opinion over their own gut & think this book is useful in parenting their sons. Ultimately, this book is about a white religious male trying to tell single mothers (while inadvertently shaming them the entire time) that their sons will be nothing without a man in their life & how to raise sons to be pompous, religious, angry men who believe they are the best thing this world has to offer ... sprinkling religion into it so it sounds good and kind & not contracting and absolutely insane.
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