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The Other Half of Asperger Syndrome (Autism Spectrum Disorder): A Guide to Living in an Intimate Relationship with a Partner who is on the Autism Spectrum Second Edition Paperback – February 21, 2014

by Maxine Aston (Author), Tony Attwood (Foreword)
4.3 4.3 out of 5 stars 573 ratings
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Does your other half have Asperger Syndrome or do you suspect that he or she is on the autism spectrum? This quick and helpful relationships guide provides all the information you need for relationship success with your ASD partner.

In the second edition of this best-selling book, Maxine Aston draws on over a decade of experience working with couples affected by Autism Spectrum Disorder. Updates include reference to recent research and information on same sex relationships, sensory issues and pregnancy. Full of bite-size tips and advice, the book explains Asperger Syndrome, discusses whether or not seeking an autism diagnosis will help, and offers simple strategies for coping with a range of relationship challenges including communication, social, and intimacy difficulties.

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Previous page
  1. Print length
    136 pages
  2. Language
    English
  3. Publisher
    Jessica Kingsley Publishers
  4. Publication date
    February 21, 2014
  5. Dimensions
    5.43 x 0.79 x 8.43 inches
  6. ISBN-10
    1849054983
  7. ISBN-13
    978-1849054980
  8. See all details
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Editorial Reviews

Review

I consider that the partners of those who have Asperger's syndrome are quite remarkable people; this book is a tribute to their personal qualities and will contribute to a significant improvement in mutual understanding and enjoyment of the relationship. -- from the foreword by Tony Attwood, Clinical Psychologist and author of The Complete Guide to Asperger's Syndrome

When I first boarded the Asperger Express bound for a journey of self-discovery, I had nothing but my own experiences and Maxine Aston's books tucked under my arm. I read them, no, I swallowed them whole, sat back and began to rethink my entire life. Her books saved my life and for that I'll forever be grateful. Besides being a pioneer of Aspergers awareness, Aston is a wonderful writer. The Other Half of Asperger Syndrome (Autism Spectrum Disorder) is a clear, easy to understand page-turner as well as an eye-opener. Since this book was first written, she's worked with hundreds of individuals on the spectrum and stayed abreast of all the latest research which imbues and enriches this 2nd edition. -- Rudy Simone, author of Aspergirls, 22 Things a Woman Must Know If She Loves a Man with Asperger's Syndrome and 22 Things a Woman with Asperger's Syndrome Wants Her Partner to Know

In a comprehensive sweep Maxine Aston manages to cover all the concepts people in AS-linked relationships need. Without shying away from tough topics, Aston gives immediately useful advice and research-based guidance. This is the type of book I like to have handy, flipping to a random page to read during tough times since every page of the book is helpful. Aston's upbeat tone and many insights give clarity to the unique issues facing couples as they improve their relationships. -- Ashley Stanford, author of Asperger Syndrome and Long-Term Relationships and Troubleshooting Relationships on the Autism Spectrum

I highly recommend this rare treasure! Couldn't put it down! Through numerous examples Aston clearly explains the differences between the Asperger and Non-Asperger partner. She encourages couples not to strive for the impossible but instead to try some of her invaluable insights and tips. A must-read! -- Louise Weston, RN. B. Nursing and author of Connecting with Your Asperger Partner

Book Description

This quick and helpful relationships guide provides all the information you need for relationship success with your ASD partner

Product details

  • Publisher ‏ : ‎ Jessica Kingsley Publishers; 2nd edition (February 21, 2014)
  • Language ‏ : ‎ English
  • Paperback ‏ : ‎ 136 pages
  • ISBN-10 ‏ : ‎ 1849054983
  • ISBN-13 ‏ : ‎ 978-1849054980
  • Item Weight ‏ : ‎ 2.31 pounds
  • Dimensions ‏ : ‎ 5.43 x 0.79 x 8.43 inches
  • Customer Reviews:
    4.3 4.3 out of 5 stars 573 ratings

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Maxine C. Aston

Maxine C. Aston

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Customer reviews

4.3 out of 5 stars
4.3 out of 5
573 global ratings

Top reviews from the United States

Brenda
5.0 out of 5 stars Wow! Amazing Book!
Reviewed in the United States on July 27, 2023
Verified Purchase
I laughed & I cried. It was like the author was reading my mind.
This book is pure gold for anyone in a relationship with an ASD partner.
I couldn’t put the book down. Explanations, understanding, relief, hope & strategies; and, a realization that you’re not alone. One of the most impactful books that I have ever read.
7 people found this helpful
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appleton schneider
5.0 out of 5 stars This is an important book for those involved in any ...
Reviewed in the United States on July 4, 2014
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This is an important book for those involved in any contexts of its subject. Though the author initially stresses that autism/Asperger's syndrome is a "mental disease", the extent to which the aberrance is environmentally entrained (or conditioned) is obvious, and even made obvious by the author. If a disease prevents one processing social, verbal, emotional cues, and thus aut/Asp is not a "psychological" disorder, then how can it be that counseling (based on changing interactions between couples in speech and expectations, etc.) can resolve the issues and "normalize" the relationship?
Despite the contradiction in thesis (so to speak), this book is valid and important in the ideas and techniques it presents. For those living with Asperger's on the "high-end", realizing that the aberrance is not a true "disease" (such as epilepsy) and can that counseling interaction-changes can "normalize" a relationship should be relief -- and resolution -- and recommendation for reading.
11 people found this helpful
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J. Barton
4.0 out of 5 stars Very helpful and practical!
Reviewed in the United States on January 25, 2023
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Very helpful for those first realizing their partner might be on the autism spectrum or has received a positive diagnosis of such. Very affirming for the neurotypical partner, “you aren’t crazy!” Practicals on how to handle typical situations that might arise in a neurodiverse relationship.
4 people found this helpful
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Laird Bishop
5.0 out of 5 stars Finally, answers!
Reviewed in the United States on May 17, 2023
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My experience of a quarter of a century with an ASD wife had profoundly negative effects on me. It felt like I was throwing all of my love into a black hole, and it took a toll on me physically, mentally, and emotionally. A sense of futility was my constant companion, and I went so far as to question my own sanity.

In a clear and concise manner, this book revealed that my wife's behaviors were explainable. It also revealed that my own turmoil was not a unique reaction to the situation. It offered the perspective I needed to regain confidence in my own sanity. It gave me actionable levers I could pull to improve the situation.

The sun seems a little brighter today as a result of reading this book. It comes with a certain sense of closure even though the situation will be ongoing for a lifetime, but it also offers hope for some mitigation with actionable insights.

I caution those with a female ASD partner to be prepared for the fact that the inclusion of a chapter dedicated to male ASD partners stands in contrast to the absence of such a chapter for female ASD partners. While this was off-putting at first, I found a wealth of perspective for us sprinkled throughout the text, and it really does not diminish the overall value. I would, however, urge the author to consider for a third edition the fact that those with a female ASD partner, already being in the minority, already find a paucity of awareness about their plight, and might appreciate the additional support.
40 people found this helpful
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LT Reviewer
3.0 out of 5 stars Slim Pickings for Books on the Subject
Reviewed in the United States on April 4, 2020
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This is a difficult book to read if you bristle at gross generalizations and unsubstantiated claims.
Just one example on page 23: "women are more likely to choose a partner to whom they can relate whereas men are more likely to choose a partner who compensates for what they find difficult or cannot do." Instead of actual research, the author draws on her own personal experience to justify her conclusions (eg, "My experience certainly backs...") So, I'm afraid there's just not a lot of reliable information here.
38 people found this helpful
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Hana
5.0 out of 5 stars Helpful for both partners
Reviewed in the United States on September 6, 2022
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It is very well written book helping both partners to navigate in relationship and smooth the edges especially for Asperger partner.
3 people found this helpful
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Kindle Customer
5.0 out of 5 stars As someone on the spectrum
Reviewed in the United States on June 18, 2022
Verified Purchase
I appreciate the sincerity of the author. I agree with a large majority of the book, but some parts seemed very uncomfortable to read...like the part where my non-ASD partner is likely to blame my "bad traits" to my disorder as if my identity is separate from it. It's a neurological impairment... it's literally me. So, apparently I'm still the problem no matter who we pretend we're really blaming. I AM Autistic...if you blame Autism for me being me, you blame me for being me.
23 people found this helpful
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Sarah T.
4.0 out of 5 stars Simple, direct
Reviewed in the United States on December 7, 2019
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This reads very much like an extended brochure. It is helpful, especially if this is your first read on the topic. A great place to start. Ultimately, I doubt other books will do more than elaborate on the simple truth: if you are partners with an Aspie, you will need to have realistic expectations, learn how to communicate in a very concise and direct manner, and draw firm boundaries to protect your selfhood.
29 people found this helpful
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Top reviews from other countries

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BusyBee
5.0 out of 5 stars Very relatable
Reviewed in the United Kingdom on October 10, 2023
Verified Purchase
The book is much slimmer than expected, but in fact has covered most subjects and is very clear and to the point. Our diagnosis came just in time to save the relationship and we purchased this book to learn more. It has made so much clarity on our situation and has really helped me understand how to communicate with my partner.
One person found this helpful
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Kathryn R.
5.0 out of 5 stars I feel a little less crazy after reading this book...
Reviewed in Canada on February 1, 2018
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This book made me not want to give up on my person... Its not going to be an easy road but will be worth it in the end.
3 people found this helpful
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TURNER MERRYL
5.0 out of 5 stars Excellente source d’information
Reviewed in France on October 23, 2017
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Un livre qui offre enfin une perspective différente sur le syndrome. Intéressant d’avoir cette vision du couple et très instructif !
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Nadia
3.0 out of 5 stars Mehr konkrete Beispiele und Lösungen erwartet
Reviewed in Germany on August 19, 2017
Verified Purchase
Bin auf der Suche nach einem richtigen Ratgeber, der konkrete Problemfelder in Beziehungen mit Menschen aus dem Autismus Spektrum aufzeigt und deren Ursachen und somit auch Lösungswegen. Dieses Buch leistet das ansatzweise, aber nicht zufriedenstellend.
3 people found this helpful
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Jeans
5.0 out of 5 stars Great book
Reviewed in Australia on May 5, 2023
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Very informative
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